Founders who inspire, leaders who motivate and managers who keep morale high are always celebrated. But we rarely talk about the moments that stay with you long after the applause fades and the decisions that do not feel heroic, which does not come with public validation and leaves you questioning yourself in some days.

Four years ago, I made one such decision and the conversation was painfully short and awkward. I let go of someone 4 years ago in the company. There were only a few sentences, an awkward pause, a nod and a quiet exit. Yet even now, years later, I still think about it. This is not a story about firing someone lightly. It is a story about growth, responsibility and the uncomfortable truth that leadership often requires choosing what is right over what feels comfortable.

When Growth Changes the Rules

In the beginning, there was nothing but belief. There were no processes, no hierarchy and no real certainty that the idea would even survive. What we had instead was exhausting chaos and a small group of people willing to endure it. He was there from the early days. He stayed when there was no money, no recognition and no guarantee that the effort would amount to anything. He worked late nights without any complaint and believed in the dream.

But growth has a way of changing everything. As the company expanded, the problems we faced were no longer about survival. They were about scale, consistency and building systems that could support not just ten people, but a hundred or more. The very traits that once helped us move fast now slowed others down. The new hires struggled to understand the unwritten rules that existed and teams found themselves redoing work because decisions were not documented. It was visible that what once felt agile has now become fragile.

I noticed the signs before I admitted them to myself. The signs were the meetings that went in circles and processes that have bypassed because “this is how we have always done it.” I tried to fix it gently through conversations, suggestions and encouragement to adapt. But how do you confront someone who is not failing, but is not growing either? As a leader, you are responsible not just for individuals, but for the system as a whole.

What These Decisions Teach You

I replayed that conversation in my head countless times. For weeks, it haunted me. But a few months later, I noticed that things began to shift. Meetings became clearer and the decisions were documented. Teams moved faster not because they worked harder, but because they worked with alignment. This is one of the cruel ironies of growth. Progress often depends on endings that feel deeply personal.

It feels good to be the leader everyone appreciates, the one who avoids conflict, who keeps things comfortable. But comfort is not the same as health. And popularity is not the same as respect. If you lead primarily to be liked, you will delay hard decisions. You will protect short time harmony. Over time, it results in teams that feel stuck and cultures that resist change. At the core of the leadership, it is not about minimizing discomfort and rather it is about taking responsibility for it.

When leaders avoid tough calls, the team notices. Leadership is not about being fearless, it is about being accountable. You do not become a better leader by making easy choices. You become one by surviving the hard ones.

If you are trying to build something that lasts, you cannot protect everyone’s comfort including your own. You will face moments like this, where there is no perfect outcome, where you will question yourself long after the decision is made. And in those moments, a simple question comes up:

Do you lead to be liked or do you lead to set an example?

The answer is revealed in actions, not intentions, as in the conversations you avoid, in the comfort you protect or sacrifice. Because in the end, leadership is not measured by how many people applaud you in the moment. It is measured by what endures when the applause is gone. The decisions that haunt you the longest are the ones that quietly make everything else possible.